ESL and IELTS Help 4 U

Confidence

Posted on: November 11, 2010

There’s a lot of talk about confidence when we’re talking about students learning English. Students want to build confidence.  Parents often told me they wanted their children to be more confident when speaking English.  Confidence-building is a class!

But what exactly is confidence? The word “confidence” is the noun form of the verb “to confide.”  When you look up “confide” at visuwords.com, some form of the word “trust” appears 8 times: trust, entrust, intrust, trustworthiness, trustingness, trustfulness. Look up these words if you don’t know them.

One of my most favorite meanings for the word trust is to allow without fear.  We don’t make ourselves confident. We allow ourselves to be confident. Confidence is something we already have. We only need to allow it to come forward.

Many people associate confidence with success. If we’re confident, everything will work out the way we want. This is often not so.  Life often works out differently than we planned. Does this mean we can never be confident? Of course not!

Others think confidence is about being number ONE, the strongest, the smartest, the best, able to beat all others. Well, there is only one number one. What about everyone else? Is it possible to be number 2 or 52 or 192 and still be confident? Of course it is!

Some think confidence is something we put on like a coat. Look and act confident no matter what. Never show you’re afraid or nervous. Is this real confidence? No.

Confidence is allowing us to be who we are and knowing that who we are is valuable.

Confidence is knowing that we’re always learning and learning involves trying and not getting it quite right and trying again.

Confidence is knowing we’ll feel afraid when we try something new and trying it anyway.

Confidence is not worrying so much what others think.  When we’re okay with ourselves, what others think isn’t very important.

Confidence is the ability to confide in oneself — to be truthful and trustworthy with yourself which then helps you be truthful and trustworthy with others.

As we allow ourselves to be more confident, our English lessons become easier. We’re more relaxed so we learn more quickly.

We can speak an English word, say it incorrectly, laugh and try again.

We have more energy to put into our studies.

We’ll take more risks in speaking out and in our writing.

No matter where you are in your English study, you are fine! Keep going! Keep learning and using what you learn! Enjoy!

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